Betrayal
When do you know someone? After 8 years of friendship you'd think you might, but apparently not. My friend is playing two girls at the same time. He continuously says he loves one of them, but how can he when on the other hand he has broken up a marriage with the other one. The sacred unity of marriage means nothing to this guy. Chris doesn't want me hanging out with him any more because he can't be trusted and I completely understand. It's not like he wanted to hang out with me any more anyway. This always seems to happen, I just can't have any friends damnit. I'm not upset tonight though, I'm just very disappointed in my friend, I had thought that he was a better man than that, but I guess not.
I may complain and argue about and with Chris, but the bottom line is that I am his wife and I love him an impossibly large amount, so there is no man that could come between that, or woman for that matter, on his behalf. Chris and I have our problems, but who doesn't? We were pressured into marriage, but an ungodly pastor, who may have been trying to do what was right, but failed miserably. I'm glad to be with Chris though, things get hard and sometimes I want to leave, but I never will, I have a tendency, that I am quickly defeating, to quit when shit gets really hard. It's more of a want then a tendency since I don't really ever quit things. Chris and I have been talking a lot and working through things, but the more we talk, the more I see how vastly different we are on important issues. This hurts, and scares me. Can we go through life together and happy at the same time?? I just don't know. I want things to work out and be ok, I know I wont leave, but if we continue to disagree will he leave me? Who knows. I've promised and he promised that no matter what we go through, we'll do it together. I've become so weak to him lately and it kills me to do that, but at the same time it helps. He has finally admitted that he is selfish, that took forever to get out. I see a bad path for us, I only hope and pray that I am wrong.
I may complain and argue about and with Chris, but the bottom line is that I am his wife and I love him an impossibly large amount, so there is no man that could come between that, or woman for that matter, on his behalf. Chris and I have our problems, but who doesn't? We were pressured into marriage, but an ungodly pastor, who may have been trying to do what was right, but failed miserably. I'm glad to be with Chris though, things get hard and sometimes I want to leave, but I never will, I have a tendency, that I am quickly defeating, to quit when shit gets really hard. It's more of a want then a tendency since I don't really ever quit things. Chris and I have been talking a lot and working through things, but the more we talk, the more I see how vastly different we are on important issues. This hurts, and scares me. Can we go through life together and happy at the same time?? I just don't know. I want things to work out and be ok, I know I wont leave, but if we continue to disagree will he leave me? Who knows. I've promised and he promised that no matter what we go through, we'll do it together. I've become so weak to him lately and it kills me to do that, but at the same time it helps. He has finally admitted that he is selfish, that took forever to get out. I see a bad path for us, I only hope and pray that I am wrong.
posted by Angel Remer at 11:05 PM
2 Comments:
If the eight-year friend works at the same place that Chris does... Then message me... If it's who I'm thinking it is than some facts somewhere are screwed up, and I'm not sure which of us has the wrong facts...
On another note, I don't know if you have a way of getting a hold of that pastor, but he needs to be informed that he screwed up... At least be aware that you feel you were pressured into the situation.
I agree. If a pastor is going around, fucking up people's relationships and thinks he is doing something good, then he needs to be put straight. Give me his name and I'll deal with the guy for ya! ;) Marriage is never easy, but it is a journey like any other. You have to learn about eachother and find baundaries and all that. Good sex helps alot, too. Seriously.
~J
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